Monday, March 13, 2006

Today's meltdown brought to you by witless trolls

I was finally able to stitch this weekend (hooray! and thank you to everyone who wished me better wrist health!), and I had to crochet a baby sweater.


Not that baby sweaters (or crochet!) are bad, but it's not what I wanted to do. I wanted to knit on my "wedding season" top, or on the wedding shawl (still not cast on! We have 4 months to go! I love to live on the edge!), but I had to work on this baby sweater.


Because I teach a class on how to make a baby sweater TOMORROW NIGHT. Yes, Tuesday night. And I wanted to have the entire sweater done (all the pieces, anyway) to (a) show to my students who have not made a sweater before (yes, I know that I haven't either. Shut up. I'm a quick learner) and (b) have read through the pattern so I know it's not all bollocksed up.

I have made the following progress:
The back is completed.
One of the fronts is completed.
I have determined that the pattern is written by witless trolls who know nothing of crochet but have only heard somewhere that it is a fun torture device when applied properly.

So. Thanks to the witless trolls over at Lion Brand (I cease to publicly recommend their yarn & patterns here and now, though I'm stuck with this pattern of theirs as it's so late in the game) I have to rewrite the pattern for my students and myself (it says "work buttonholes spacing them evenly on front" but it doesn't say HOW to work the damn things--as part of the rows? as a separate element? after working the front do I reattach the yarn and work side-to-side? You bastards, tell me something useful!) and do it by 7:00 tomorrow night. I also have to create other class materials, but that's more of my own fault. I can't blame the witless trolls at Lion Brand for that, much as I'd like to.

(Did you see that run-on sentence? Holy hell, my high school English teacher would be appalled. But I find it cheering. I don't know why.)

Oh, and Saturday? First time I cried about the wedding planning. Because it's a freaking nightmare, people. Absolutely insane. Limited funds + exhortation to invite the whole family (including the completely awful ones) + exhortation to invite people we don't know = impossible & tears. Fortunately we may have a solution to the madness. More on that later. Because I must go crochet a baby sweater. Ugh.

Only four entire months of insanity left to go! Yipeee!


Anna said...

Just remember more people at the wedding=more gifts or wedding card cash. Good luck with the students tonight.

SheCrochets said...

I love patterns that leave crucial instructions off. It just makes it soooooo much fun to crochet. Oh wait. I HATE those patterns.

Good luck with the class and the wedding planning. Speaking as somebody who planned a wedding on a limited budget and in a limited timeframe... it can be done!!! You just might have a few meltdowns while doing it. :-)