Femiknitter Will Probably Appreciate This Most Of All

Hey kiddies, sorry to have left all that yarn up there for a week. I didn't mean to make you wach my commercialism on purpose. I spent most of last week either blowing my nose every three seconds, bitching about my inability to smell or taste anything, or under heavy sedation (god bless Nyquil), and wasn't able to get to the computer. And then, when I was able, I didn't really want to. You know.

But I started feeling loads better on Saturday and Sunday, and this is what happened:


This might be more impressive if I had a picture of what this corner of the office looked like before. Or what the insides of the drawers looked like, for that matter. I got rid of FOUR huge BAGS OF YARN (stop freaking out, it was crap acrylic) which I had acquired in the days when I was a new crocheter with high hopes of an afghan for everyone I knew! and purchased with quantity, rather than quality, in mind. Lots of Red Heart. Lots of leftovers. Lots of crap just taking up space. Those bags were surrounding the dresser like grumpy castle guards, making it very difficult for me to get into the drawers. Eventually I stopped using them for actual storage. When I emptied them out they just had a few scraps each. Excellent use of space!!!


Now, the dresser holds almost all my yarn (not the sock yarn, that's still in the living room). The top drawer holds leftover balls that are actually worth keeping around, a case of embroidery floss, my shears, and probably other things. (What? It's a spring cleaning, not a spring complete-conversion-to-the-church-of-Martha.) The other three drawers are packed with all my real yarn. I even emptied out the under-bed storage box and moved that stuff in with the rest.

The blue bag to the left of the dresser holds the crocheted ripple afghan my grandma Shirley was working on before she died. The plastic bags in the foreground hold all the yarn I'm trying to sell (see previous post and also here if you are interested and if you are I love you a lot). I do have one more large bag (another crocheted afghan project) that's currently out in the living room. It taunts me with its mass.


This is the top of the dresser. The wicker basket is holding my current WIPs. The crate holds my swift, ballwinder, and Eucalan (other stuff too, but I'll share that another day). The top of the crate holds some Cascade EcoWool (for swatching or for a house cozy - that stuff has some outstanding yardage), my straight needle roll, and the dyepot and dyecolander, which of course both hold extra yarn that won't fit in the dresser.

And that is the story of how a little case of cabin fever can turn into a giant destashing and a soothing feeling of having control over one's yarn. Let us hope it lasts.

Pssst! Wanna buy some Mohair?

All yarn has lived with me for 3+ years in a non-pet, non-smoking home, and has spent most of its time in plastic bags. It's lovely stuff, but mohair and I just don't get along. I'm open to PayPal and check (will wait until it clears). Shipping (you choose method) is not included in the price here, but will be when the order is compete.

For Sale Unger Legacy Cotton/Mohair


9 x 50g balls of Unger Legacy, one ball had been swatched and then rewound, but all the yardage (appx 140 yds per ball) is there.
32% nylon, 26% acrylic, 26% cotton, 16% mohair
Color #01, Dove
Price: $35.00 the lot

For Sale Mohair of Unknown Origin

A friend works at a place where yarn companies send their stuff to be made into color cards. They have huge amounts left over, and I got this batch in a sale a few years ago. It came to me in weird cone-shaped hanks, and I've wound them into yarn cakes. I don't know what brand this is, what the total fiber content is (though Mohair is pretty obvious), and I don't know the yardage. The yarn WPI is about 6 with space left for the fluffs to spread out.


Dark purple, 9 ounces
Price: $20.00 now $10.00


Blue/purple variegated, 11 ounces
Price: $24.00 now $12.00


Raspberry/deep pink, 10 ounces
Price: $22.00 now $11.00


Midnight blue, 6.5 ounces
Price: $11.00 now $5.50


Medium blue, 5.5 ounces
Price: $9.00 now $4.50


Turquoise/robin's egg blue, 2 ounces
Price: $4.00 now $2.00


Acid green, 3 ounces
Price: $5.00 now $2.50


Dark blue, 4.5 ounces
Price: $6.50 now $3.25

Want the whole lot? All Mystery Mohair for $40.00 plus shipping.

Having found my sub-niche

Thanks to everyone for your sympathy in my last two posts. I'm sorry I haven't been able to reply to all of you directly -- Blogger doesn't give me your email addresses all the time. Grr.

This week has gone better (dark chocolate and Merlot have kept me just out-of-it enough), and is ten times more better because I have tomorrow (Friday) off. And though that means I have to work Saturday, I'll be all alone in the basement of the library and can play music through the computer's speakers instead of my headphones. !!! That's just the kind of rebel that I am.

And for the record, I did totally kick winter's ass and send it packing. For about three days. Now it's cold and grey and rainy and entirely non-glorious today, and winter just sits out there, begging to come back into my life and telling me it's the only season that could make me happy, that spring doesn't love me like it does, and that summer's just a flash-in-the-pan.

Whatever. Winter, you suck.

And I suck for not having a photo of anything WIP-ish, but I am in a bit of a snit with most of my projects just now, and we're not speaking.

This, however, does not suck:



Yes, it's the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Knit Along. I'm a fan of Buffy, I'm a fan of knitting, it all works out beautifully. It's the whole pointy stick/pointy stick affinity. The sweet thing about this KAL, aside from the obvious BtVS-ness, is that there are no time limits, no mandated patterns. Just hang out and knit and discuss. Plus you get to pick which category you want to be in -- Slayers, Vamps, Witches, Scoobies, Watchers, Demons. It's awesome. If you love Buffy (or Angel), you should join. (I'm talking to you. You know who you are.)

I embrace the weird, and it embraces me back.

Revenge of the Snowed-Upon

Take that Winter, you bastard!

(It's a bad cellphone pic of me, kicking snow. Yes, I am twenty-seven years old and mature beyond my years.)

The Universe Slaps Me Down

Just a short post to let the internet know that I can't write a decent post right now. This week is not going my way in so many different ways that it's hard to know where to start the story of how I hate it. I'll give you a list, because as Femiknitter knows, there are few things I like as much as a good list.

1. It freaking snowed last night. Ugh. Winter is starting to act like the scummy, needy ex-boyfriend who won't leave you alone and leaves notes for you on your doorstep and slowly creeps into stalker territory. Winter is a stalker. Go away, Winter, you bastard.

2. I can't count. I have now put the heel in one of my socks twice, and both times I have had either too many stitches or too few. I have temporarily banished them until I have my wits about me. This may take a while.

3. I don't know what month or week it is. Seven times this week (and keep in mind that I'm writing this on Wednesday morning, so that makes it "in two days") I've thought that it's either next week or 5 weeks from now. Seven times in two days. I need more of something in my diet. Probably more vacation.

4. The software switchover at work is not. going. well. Day one? 1500 errors from the offline/back up system we were using last week. Day two? Staff records still not uploaded. What could day three possibly bring? My money's on a plague of toads. Toads or book-eating locusts.

5. I had ten people clamoring to get into my beginner knitting class, and I could only take eight, and ONLY FOUR OF THEM SHOWED UP LAST NIGHT. I could spit nails. And one of the four women left right away. She already knows how to knit (using a spool to make i-cord) and just wants to know how to bind off (she'll come back on the last day). Another woman just could. not. get. it. I felt so bad for her, especially after a 7-year-old girl came up to us while I was helping her do the long-tail cast on (she was trying to use two needles; she never did get it), and told us she learned to knit when she was five years old. After a while this woman just sat and cackled and tried to knit with three straight needles (I honestly have no idea). I don't know how to help her, especially as I've already put my hands on her hands and demonstrated the knit stitch and she still did not get it. Fortunately the other two women took to knitting like ducks to water and are even knitting continental (yes!). Only one of the four people who showed up actually brought the yarn (Cascade 220) that I put on their required materials list.

And now I have to get ready for work (deep sigh). I wonder how this day will go.

I Am With My People

My day started all virtuous-like. I went to the chiropractor (where I heard, again, that I'm running sideways, and to stretch ALL THE TIME), went to the gym, then stopped at various stores for those necessities I mentioned.

And then apparently I made a vow to devote my writing time equally between normal writing and parenthetical writing (I think it's working out pretty well so far).

So, I ate lunch, thought about what I was going to pack in my knitting bag, showered, and then had like 3 more hours until I wanted to leave for Oak Brook (I wanted to get there early, but 6 hours before the reading started sounded a little nuts, even to me).

What did I do with all that time?
I made the bed (a rare occurance Chez HookOn, unless I've just changed the sheets)...


... I washed most of the dishes and cleaned the counters and (though you can't see it from here) I even swept and sort-of-mopped the floor (I used a wet paper towel to get all the leftover crumbs)...


... and I cleaned the stove (it was truly horrific. The bowls and protective rims that sit under the burners? I'm not sure if I have ever cleaned them, and I've lived in this apartment for three years. They are soaking in the sink.)


At this point I was feeling quite virtuous, and very deserving of a trip to see my most favorite author. I selected projects to take along to the reading, two of which you've already seen...

the grey bag ends (heh) for the to-be-felted bag,


and the second pair of socks (STR Fred Flintstone, lightweight, 2.5mm needles).

(make note of how much shorter the top sock is than the bottom sock... this will come into play later on.*)
The third project is a headband (the same one that Femiknitter made a while back) that I just started yesterday as I waited to leave for Oak Brook. I'll talk more about it later, because right now it is just i-cord, and you know what that looks like.

I left my house about 4:00pm with my knitting, necessities, water, and camp chairs. Why camp chairs? Because I heard that Borders in Oak Brook was only putting out 75 chairs. Then I heard it was 100 chairs. Foolish muggles -- when will they learn?

Laugh at me if you will, but I get a little nervous driving into the suburbs when I'm going somewhere for the first time. I don't get nervous about the actual driving, but I worry that I'll miss my exit and accidentally drive to Indiana (almost happened once).

I arrived without mishap at 5:10pm. Here's the view I had (from the fourth row... yes!!!!)


I walked in and saw the tell-tale signs that I was not the only knitter there. Shawls on shoulders, knit-or-die t-shirts(no actual picture, I was walking out of the bathroom and, strangely, didn't have my camera ready), felted bags... it was great. I bought some books and while I was in line I saw a woman wearing this great pink cabled sweater (do I have a picture? No, of course not) and I asked her if she made it and if I could touch it AND SHE DIDN'T BACK AWAY! She was a knitter and she understood!



I don't know if this applies to anyone else, but I've gotten the feeling that people (muggles) think I'm working a few beers shy of a six-pack when I walk up to them and ask to examine their sweaters. This is off-putting (to me) and makes me feel like my knitting is this highly un-understandable weird anomaly, and therefore, you know, so am I.



But this! This room full of knitters! I felt completely at home and comfortable. If you know me personally, you might snicker at this, but generally I feel kind of shy and awkward with people I don't know. Especially groups. However, this appears to apply only to muggles. I was all over the place, talking... (turns out my one-seat-away neighbor Renae [Hi Renae!] used to live in DeKalb and demonstrated how to use 2 circular needles to make an in-the-round item [a new-to-me concept]) ...and ogling yarn across the aisle and getting up to talk to the knitter about where she got it and what was it, and having a grand old time. Everyone was saying things like "I love that, what is it?" and "What are you working on" and eventually a wise woman stepped up to the microphone and said "While we're waiting, who wants to have a show-and-tell?" So we all showed off what we were working on. It was amazing. It was like this huge stitch-n-bitch full of happy energy. During the show-and-tell (I think), Nick sent me a text message saying he hoped I was having fun. My return text message said "I am with my people!"

Anna (who has written about all this already) and Heather were there by this point, and we were just looking at each other grinning. Grinning like fools.

Then Stephanie appeared. She blogged us blogging her blogging us (one of those infinite cat things... infinite blogger?),

(the Bohus? freaking stunning in person)
and she spoke. And she was hilarious and encouraging and unifying and hilarious and smart and strong and ohmygod was she funny. I saw her two years ago (or thereabouts (I just said "thereabouts." I am my father.)) and I loved that experience, but I had just learned to knit and didn't feel comfortable doing any work while I was trying to listen to her. This time, I had no trouble knitting while she was talking (I knit on the socks only, by the way), and could even look up from my knitting when I got to the stockinette parts! I felt like a real, live, grown-up knitter!

After she was done speaking and taking questions (during which she introduced a seven-year-old knitter to the word "harlot" and some of its meaning, and almost fell over laughing while doing so), we all got in a line to get our books signed (knitters with children first!). Strangely, the three of us all had socks on the needles. A lovely fellow knitter took our picture:


and then I took hers -- blog, meet Rachel. Hi Rachel!

Her sock (that of her second pair ever) matched her knitting bag and her top and jacket ENTIRELY BY COINCIDENCE. She may be the most coincidentally well-put-together knitter I've ever met. (it was great to wait in line with you!)

Then we got to the signing table and I gave Stephanie some wee gifties (from the three of us DeKalb knitters) and I got to hold the sock (!!!)

and of course, we're blurry.

I had the best time.

*(And the socks that were wildly different lengths when I began my tale?...

... I can't tell them apart now!)

Matters of Great Import

1. The Llama Song
I am going to be singing this in my head all day today. And now, so are you. Because the orange slayed the rake. Think about that one.

2. The Walker Treasury Project Hosts a Contest
Yes, friends and neighbors, a contest! Head over to The Walker Treasury Project and check out the contest page. You can win fabulous prizes just for commenting! Or for swatching up a pattern from one of the treasuries and posting for the first time during the month of April! Or for taking a really good picture! The possibilities are almost endless. I'm donating a bunch of MOHAIR yarn as prizes (it's good stuff, it just isn't my scene, man), and Karrie is donating some world-famous moustache buttons (god, I love them!). You need to enter the contest.

3. This Is What Spring Looks Like Where I Am





Yes, my town still has its Christmas tree up. I took this picture last week, when it was still March, but still -- it was March, and Christmas had been over for three whole months. 'Tis no longer the season, and we're not a town known for its year-round jollitude. Let's just put it away.

4. Work Gives Me Nightmares
I sort of woke up this morning freaking out (but slowly, in that half-asleep way that seems all fast-paced in your head but is really just you drooling on your pillow and twitching) about the software switchover going on this week at work. I'm so delighted to discover I'm this immersed in my job.

5. I'm going to see the Harlot tonight!
I've planned my knitting, plotted my route, and taken the day off work (in the midst of software switchovers, we are in life). I'm going to purchase a few necessities, pack a lunch/dinner/meal thingy, and get to Oak Brook by 5pm (at the latest). Stephanie's not scheduled to start talking until 7:30, but Borders is only setting out 100 chairs. Foolish muggles *shakes head*. When will they learn? And don't these people research anything about their speakers?

I'll report back tomorrow(-ish) with pictures from the Dada camera (hopefully it'll take a few decent shots, what with the event being indoors at night -- its favorite environment) and tales of my exploits. Ah yes, the exploits.