Thursday, June 08, 2006

In Which Alcoholism Begins to Look Good

This is all happening to me because I'm making a 13-pointed shawl to wear on my wedding day.

Last Thursday morning I mailed off nearly all of our wedding invitations. (Damn little bits of paper that we stayed up till 1:30am folding! Snarl! I love them!)

Right, so cross that off our (bloody massive) to-do list! Except no! We can't cross it off because on Saturday at my (blissfully) last bridal shower, some friends of Nick's Mom tell me that they got someone else's invitation (Name B with Address A) and it turns out the whole thing is my fault because I entered the information into my spreadsheet wrong (there go my aspirations toward a career in data entry... shucks) and now I am horrified and embarrassed beyond belief and wish the fates would see fit to strike me down with a bolt of lightning, or at least a deep 6-week long coma.

But that wasn't the worst part. After the shower I learn that this kerfuffle has deprived someone's relative of his/her invitation. This relative is ... sensitive to oversights and often takes such things very personally and has been known to be a tad unreasonable. Again I wish for that swift lighting bolt. I remain conscious and arrange to send out another invitation to this relative immediately on Monday morning.

Can I breathe easy now? No, absolutely not. Later on Saturday I realize yet another mistake: I sent an invitation (another Name B with Address A) to the home of someone who isn't invited! How stunningly brilliant! Hey, we cut you from the list and just to rub it in (even though you didn't know it) we're sending an invitation to your house addressed to someone else! Ha! Lightning bolt, you may fire when ready.

Perhaps the invitation situation has resolved itself? Not a chance. Sunday afternoon we get a call from Nick's Dad, who tells us that his brother hasn't gotten his invitation (okay, well, we just sent them out on Thursday...). We check the address, the address is correct. We send out another invitation to this brother who may now be getting two invitations. Where is that damn lightning bolt?

You would think by now everything that could go wrong has done so, but you would be wrong. Mercifully nothing happened on Monday, but on Tuesday (Mark-of-the-Beast Day, you know) I received two invitations in the mail, returned to me because there was no such name at the address. Of course, the addressee was my aunt and her family. Then I check my voice mail and learn that Nick's aunt hasn't received her invitation yet and was getting worried. Oh my god, just smite me now.

(And as I type this I'm getting a message from Blogger saying that "saving and publishing may fail" and I'm so tired of Blogger having its head up its ass, and I want it to go away.) (It eventually did.)

Whiskey, anyone?


peninah said...

{hugs} I went through it and somehow survived mostly unscathed. It was painful. It was stressful. Er, it was more than stressful but I don't know a stronger word. Most people forgave us for mistakes. I got into trouble with the thank yous.. which took uhm, quite a while to be sent.


I have many other invitation horror stories to tell (of others), your "problems" are not that bad at all... trust me.

[switch to ;) er, AFTER the wedding. :)]

Brandy said...

I feel your pain. So sorry. When we sent out invitations, everything was good until 2 weeks before our wedding and the church we were suppose to get married in up and canceled us. I had to call everyone to tell them about the other church. It was horrible. Good luck on everything going smoothly from here on out.